Wag More, Bark Less

Sitting in traffic, while attempting to run several errands between clients, I noticed a small sign on the rear window of the car ahead of me. It was a timely message, particularly since I was beginning to feel my patience draining as I sat through a second round of lights while trying to navigate across a busy intersection. The sign offered a simple command: "Wag More, Bark Less." Even if I weren't a dog owner, I could understand the sentiment behind this zen-like statement. How many times in the past few days have you come across a person intent on baring his or her teeth, barking their needs? Have you, yourself, been caught up growling and snarling your demands over the past week?

I am a great student of the lessons my two Danes offer me and if you are a regular reader of this blog, you too, have learned some lessons from Zeebo and Suki. Dogs have a wonderful ability to communicate; they don't think twice about expressing what they feel. When Zeebo is happy, particularly when I say one of his most-loved words like "cookie," he jumps and leaps straight up in the air on his hind legs, coming eye-to-joyful-eye with me. When Suki is frightened about a noise, she crouches down with her tail tucked in tight between her legs and lays her ears back, flat against her bony skull. When Suki invites Zeebo to play, she wags her tail and smiles at him in the way only dogs can smile. My dogs rarely misread my cues and signals, so observant are they of my gestures and actions. Think about when you have been in the presence of a lovable, friendly dog. He conveyed his positive regard of you through his body language. He wagged his tail, looked adoringly into your eyes and perhaps offered up a paw for you to take or tried to give you a gentle lick of approval.

We are often not as gifted as our furry, four-legged friends at conveying our wishes or reading our fellow humans' cues or desires. Sometimes we "bark" when what is really needed at the time is a good "wag." Often we think that growling and complaining about what is not going right in our lives or relationships is the only way to draw attention to a problem. Or that they best way to convey our thoughts to another is by yipping and snapping with irritability. What I believe, and what I teach my clients, is that it is important to be able to express our thoughts and needs in a clear and authentic way in order for the message to be heard and internalized by another. Growling and snapping is most certainly one way to convey one's feelings and thoughts, but it is probably not the best way to secure love and affection if that is one's goal. When we are in the presence of another whose attitude is one of negativity, criticism and complaint, most of us want to move as far away from the grumbler as possible.

So how do you convey your thoughts and place yourself in a position to be more likely to receive what you want? You got it: Wag more. A human smile is the equivalent of a dog's tail wag (excerpted from "Dog's Never Lie About Love" by Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson). Dogs are not stingy with whom they bestow their wags upon and people, too, should not be stingy with their own expressions of affection, joy and happiness towards others. Wagging more means to acknowledge the abundance already present in your life. To wag more means to verbalize gratitude to those around you whom you care about and love. To wag means to be attentive toward another: listening to them and observing their body language. To wag means to allow playfulness and joy to wash over you on a daily basis.

Dogs appear to have an unlimited capacity for showing their love to humans and I believe the world as a whole would benefit if we were to emulate this one dog trait. So go let the dogs out, offer up a paw and give those around you a good wag today!

Thought for the Day: Wag more this week. Bark less. Experience how much better you feel and how differently those around you respond.

If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend,
If you can face the world without lies and deceit,
If you can say honestly that deep in your heart you have no prejudice against creed, color, religion or politics,
Then, my friend, you are almost as good as your dog.

Unknown Author