ABCs of a Great Life

This month the beach towels and fun in the sun gear will be stashed away til June in order to clear the way for a brand-new academic year. Even if you don't have children in the house, flipping the calendar page over to the month of September marks the beginning of a new season. If you do have children still at home, the first weeks of September can be quite hectic and difficult as you and the other members of your family adjust to a new morning schedule, demands of homework and extracurricular activities. It is likely that over the course of the coming weeks and months you will be revisiting some distant memories of long division, algebraic equations or verb conjugations as you help your child master new academic skills and tasks this year.

When I close my eyes, I can still picture the repeating border of ABCs in capital, small letter and cursive form which wrapped around my second grade classroom like a stationary Wall Street ticker tape. I remember tracing the more complicated letters like cursive little "k" and cursive capital "Z." in the air with my finger before committing my No. 2 pencil to paper. Many people probably learned the alphabet like this: "A is for apple...B is for ball...C is for cat... Z is for zebra." And you can probably sing the "ABC song" in your sleep by now and maybe even in another language or two. A few weeks while poking about a little gift shop, I spotted a large, engraved marble plaque tucked away on a shelf. As I took a closer look at what was engraved on the plaque, along with the ABCs, I immediately realized that the uplifting message was perfect for this entry.
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Accept Differences
Be Kind
Count Your Blessings
Dream
Express Thanks
Forgive
Give Freely
Harm No One
Imagine More
Jettison Anger
Keep Confidences
Love Truly
Master Something
Nurture Hope
Open Your Mind
Pack Lightly
Quell Rumors
Reciprocate
Seek Wisdom
Touch Hearts
Understand
Value Truth
Win Graciously
Xeriscape
Yearn for Peace
Zealously Support a Worthy Cause
--Anonymous
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The message of the new (and improved) ABCs is one that each of us can aspire to implement and make a part of our everyday experience. The new ABCs encourages us to become more of some things and less of others. More loving, accepting, and tolerant of ourselves and others and less bitter, unforgiving and self-absorbed. The new and improved ABCs encourage each of us to be more empathic, altruistic and compassionate to those around us.

Acts of kindness and generosity enhance our levels of psychological and physical health. When one is willing to put their own concerns away for a while in order to help another, the result is decreased loneliness, enhanced self-esteem and self-worth for all. Research has shown that altruistic people live longer and healthier lives. In one study that followed 400 women for 30 years, researchers found that 52% of those who did not engage in volunteer work experienced a major illness--compared with only 36% of those who did volunteer. Another large study found a 44% reduction in early death among those who volunteered--a greater effect that exercising four times a week (cite, Heart Math Institute). University of Michigan's Institute for Social Research found that older people who are helpful to others reduce their risk of dying by nearly 60% compared to peers who provide neither practical health nor emotional support to relatives, neighbors or friends. Using MRI scans, scientists have identified specific regions of the brain that are active during deeply and compassionate emotions. Neurochemicals also enter into the picture of what happens to tbe brain when we engage in altruistic actions. A recebt study has identified high levels of the hormone oxytocin in people who are very charitable toward others. When you are altruistic, lending a helping hand, your oxytocin level goes up, which helps to relieve stress. Additionally, such behavior also may trigger the brain's reward circuitry--the feel-good chemicals of dopamine and endorphins, are released.

So this is the month to put into practice the new ABCs--not only will it improve your relationships with others but it will likely improve your mental and physical health as well!

(This entry is excerpted from my monthly ezine: Envision Your Dreams. If you would like to subscribe, please visit my website.)

Little Help From Friends

Yesterday I along with some 8,000 folks participated in the annual Falmouth Road Race, a 7.1 mile course which winds it's way from Woods Hole to Falmouth, MA around a lighthouse, and along scenic views of Martha's Vineyard. The race started 35 years ago as a bet between a few friends as to who could run from one bar in Woods Hole to another bar in Falmouth in the fastest time. Those harriers probably had no idea that the bar bet race would one day turn into one of the largest road races in the country drawing the fastest world class runners to compete for the $10K winner's purse.

As I am not of the ranks of the fleetest feet in the world, I started with my friends Robin and Beth safely esconsed in the middle of the pack. Robin, Beth and I have been running together for summertime-only years. While pounding out the miles and dripping in sweat, we have shared, confided, and laughed about our lives. We are always up for a run together and this was the first time the three of us ran the road race together. It's thrilling to hear and feel the pre-race excitement in the air as we all waited for the horn blast signaling the beginning of the race. The first thing one hears after the blast is the sound of thousands of running shoes slapping the pavement, cheers and whoops from the spectators and the buzz of the chip timers as the runners cross the start line. It is truly an amazing sight to see: the back of bobbing heads of so many runners stretched out in toward the front the faces of even more runners behind.

My running buddies and I felt great at the start of the race. There are certain points on the course where we knew we would see friends and family members cheering us on. Just beyond mile 3, the course began to become more challenging. This stretch always surprises me since we run right next to the water and the view to Martha's Vineyard and Falmouth Heights is spectacular. What makes it so difficult is there is very little breeze and for the next mile and a half, no shade. Before we hit this stretch, Beth pulled ahead and Robin and I wished her well. She is the youngest of the three of us and she is also in the middle of training for her next marathon. From this point on, Robin and I traded supportive and encouraging comments to motivate each other to the finish line at mile 7. The going was tough, the humidity was intense, but we crossed the line together.

After a refreshing shower, Beth, Robin and her family and I and mine sat around for a few hours replaying the event and sharing with the others our experiences. Al, Robin's husband, recounted a man in a Sponge Bob costume...my husband described the Kenyan, Okari's, winning finish, outrunning the American by 20 seconds. Beth described her race while Robin and I were simply relieved to have it behind us.

The event and the afterevent reminded me of the importance of frienships: a good friend reminds you of what you can accomplish when you are doubting your ability. A good friend listens to your perspective and offers comment or opinion when asked. A good friend congratulates your achievement. I feel blessed to have such friends who are there when I need them and who know that I am there for them as well. Although it is sad to acknowledge that the days of summer are ending, signalling the time to say goodbye to my running buddies, I am so very thankful to have the time to share with them to grow our relationships.

Thought for the Day: What can you do this week to acknowledge or nurture a friendship? What can you do to let your friend know how much their presence in your life means to you.

"Lean on me, when you're not strong, and I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on, for it won't be long, 'til I'm going to need somebody to lean on."
- "Lean On Me"